The Rapta. Amazing what you can find on Google, amirite?
The Rapta is like Jesus, Shaft, Samuel L. Jackson, and a velociraptor combined. He's a bad-ass mofo who possesses a curious sexual prowess yet also has divine powers and prehistoric deadliness. He will judge the masses with a holy righteous anger and urban style. He will cast people into Hell while saying something Samuel L. Jackson-esque like, "Sleep tight, motherfuckers." And he's not afraid to whip out his talons and cut any believers who give him lip. The Rapta is both awe-inspiring and terrifying. And when he comes back for his followers, it's going to be one cool, urban, shit-storm of an apocalypse. Think Jurassic Park. Think the book of Revelation. Think Pulp Fiction. Now think of all those things combined and set against a soundtrack of 90s Warren G and Snoop Dogg.
Better get right the Rapta now, folks. He's scheduled to come back October 22, 2011. Spread the word. (Hey, that's tomorrow!)
*I really don't. Transition device, people!