Monday, September 19, 2011

Reflections as an Adult: Dawson's Creek

If you were a teenage girl in late 90s/early 00s, there is a good chance you were obsessed with Dawson's Creek. I watched it faithfully every Wednesday night until my mom put the kibosh on it and I had to resort to watching it at my friend Dawn's house during sleepovers, which caused me to fall behind on the storyline, thus FOREVER PUTTING A DAMPER ON MY TEENAGE YEARS. Not that I'm bitter or anything.

ANYway, my friend Alisha and I decided to revisit this magical time in our lives, so we started re-watching the show. While we got sucked right back into the teenage drama and angst, some things did stick out watching it as adults:

1. Pacey dresses like a dad. He's FIFTEEN. COME ON.

15 year-old Pacey

Typical father

2. They don't talk like typical high school kids. When I was fifteen, I thought their extensive vocabulary and general OWNING of the English language was sophisticated, and my goal was to speak like them. Re-watching the show as an adult, their language didn't come off as sophisticated. Instead, they sound like a bunch of socially awkward gifted kids. In one episode, Joey actually calls Dawson a sphincter. She actually uses the word sphincter non-ironically. At my high school, calling someone a sphincter put you on the fast track to eating lunch with the kid who pissed his pants during band practice and the other kid who had a key-chain of two people having sex doggy-style (true stories). Why? Because using the word "sphincter" as an insult makes you look like a fucking loser, that's why.

3. Joey is a HUGE, catty bitch. We all know that Jen's a whore, but come on. From the second Joey meets her, she is all, "Are you a size queen?" and, "Are you a virgin, 'cause Dawson is." For someone living in a small town whose dad is in prison, whose mom is dead, and whose sister is knocked up and living in sin with her--gasp!--black boyfriend, Joey sure likes to race dangerously on the freeway to becoming a complete social outcast. "Hi, kettle? This is Joey. You're black." Also, as Alisha pointed out, she wears poor people clothes:

There's Joey, looking all poor and stuff.

4. Dawson is a HUGE goober. He's just so whiny! In one episode he was PMS-ing over the fact that Jen went to the school dance with a football player and even the look on Joey's face was all, "Dude, pull the tampon out of your vag and just GO TO THE FUCKING DANCE ALREADY, JESUS." When I was fifteen, Dawson was my perfect man. Re-watching the show as an adult, he's still the perfect man...if you like women. Snap! Oh no I di'int! 

All that being said, I still love this show. What other series could rock such an awesome 90s soundtrack

Monday, September 5, 2011

Bay Area Eats: The Brunchery

On Saturday, I met Ali for brunch at the appropriately-named Brunchery. I had been there once before and really enjoyed it. The restaurant's decor, food and general atmosphere reek of going to grandma's house. It's comforting, and the food can go toe-to-toe with Denny's or Perkins in both taste and pricing (actually, it might even be cheaper!) any day. However, Saturday's visit left a bad taste in my mouth (pun intended).

It wasn't what I ordered. The Bayshore Benedict was a tasty variation on the classic eggs benedict, with a croissant, scrambled eggs, bacon, tomatoes, and hollandaise sauce ($8.59). It wasn't the service; our waiter was incredibly polite and speedy with getting us our food and refilling our coffee cups. The trouble came when I went to check out.

Earlier this year, I purchased a $16 Groupon for The Brunchery. After that amount was deducted from our bill, the damage was only $5.78. I told Ali I'd take care of the meal, and she agreed to take care of the tip. When I gave the cashier my debit card, he said he couldn't take debit because they only run cards on amounts of $10 or more. I didn't have any cash on me, so what I ended up having to do was purchase a gift card for $10.78 and use that to pay for the rest of the bill. In short, I had to pay five dollars more than what I should have had to pay.

It's not the amount that pisses me off. $10.78 is still a pretty good deal for two coffees and two entrees. It's the principle of the matter. Even though it's no longer illegal for stores to refuse small credit card charges, I think it's a little ridiculous to penalize consumers for opting to use cards. I rarely carry cash on me simply because paying with a card is quicker and easier and I get rewards points every time I use my debit or credit card. I shouldn't have to over-pay just because my purchase falls under a certain dollar amount.

C'est la vie, I guess. But I don't think I will be going back to The Brunchery. Problem is, I still have a $5 gift card. So I thought I'd have a little giveaway. If anybody out there wants the gift card, be the first person to leave a comment on this post. It doesn't even have to be about the post. You can comment about how you're looking forward to the new season of Mike & Molly for all I care. ('Cause I sure am!) In all fairness, the food is pretty great. Just be sure to pay in cash if your bill is less than $10.

* * *
This gift card is only good for The Brunchery located off MacDill Ave. in Tampa. If you're out of state, you're out of luck. Sorry. Unless you are planning on visiting or something.  

Just so you know I'm not lying.

Five dolla, mo fos!