Poor Dean. He hit a nerve and didn't even know it. Recently, I have been struggling with feeling like I'm invisible. I've filled out tons of job applications and have received no answer. I've met the priest at the church I started attending about three times, and I still think he has no idea who I am when I shake his hand after Mass. At events with my singles group, girls all around me are getting business cards and being chatted up while I'm being passed over (and I don't even have to smear the blood of a slaughtered lamb on myself!). It's like I'm getting the big ol' finger from all sides.
The latter of the instances described above has been an especially tough pill to swallow lately with the advent of Valentine's Day. I've felt this way on other occasions, sure, but the feelings are never as amplified as they are when they occur around this time of year. I don't really confide to my friends when I happen to feel this way, because I don't want to come off as emo and whiny and all, "Woe is me!" because, despite the funks I find myself in from time to time (and I know I'm hardly alone), I know I've got it good. I've been blessed with amazing friends with whom I've had fun (and random, and crazy, and silly and...) experiences. Even though my job tries my sanity, I am thankful that I do have an income and that I'm not struggling to make ends meet. I've got a family that loves me. Work pants that are finally hemmed and make look like a savvy businesswoman. I do love my life. It would just be nice for somebody to see me once in awhile.
This Valentine's Day, I will be at Green Iguana with my singles group. I know I'll have a blast, and that I will bust a move on the dance floor and generally revel in merriment. I just wish that one of these Valentine's Days I will be able to celebrate with someone who thinks I'm worth the time and who sees me.